


Every Waking Moment

by CRYptidSpaceKid



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anxiety, Bisexual Alexander Hamilton, Bullying, Gay, Gay John Laurens, Homophobic Language, Implied Sexual Content, LGBTQ Character, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Minor Original Character(s), References to Depression, References to Illness, Tags May Change, Trans Character, Trans Male Character, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-08
Updated: 2018-12-08
Packaged: 2019-09-13 08:35:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 6,199
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16889190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CRYptidSpaceKid/pseuds/CRYptidSpaceKid
Summary: I would like to put a trigger warning out that covers many themes of the story (in case you don't feel like skimming the tags or I missed something)TW:References to Mental Health IssuesImplied ProstitutionUnhealthy Coping Mechanisms (Working themselves sick)Homophobic/LGBTQ-phobic languageBullying (Rude name calling [whore, deadnames])If you feel that this isn't a good story for you to be reading, I completely understand!





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> I would like to put a trigger warning out that covers many themes of the story (in case you don't feel like skimming the tags or I missed something)
> 
> TW:  
> References to Mental Health Issues  
> Implied Prostitution  
> Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms (Working themselves sick)  
> Homophobic/LGBTQ-phobic language  
> Bullying (Rude name calling [whore, deadnames])
> 
> If you feel that this isn't a good story for you to be reading, I completely understand!

"Finally, I made it," Alex sighed, carrying his small bag of items into the lobby of the giant school. After saving money since he came to America and selling himself nearly every night, no matter what type of person they seemed to be. Shady or not, he always left with heavier pockets than he came with. A certain brunette always seemed to be seeking Alex out, so he often gave in to her. Plus, she paid good money. Besides the point, Alex was glad to finally have the chance to attend King's College.

"Name please," a man at the front desk said.

"Alexander Hamilton," Alex said, bouncing around from the ball of his foot to the heel, then back to the ball of his foot.

"Alright, you're all set. Your dorm is room 437. Please feel free to take a look around, but keep in mind that classes don't start until Monday next week," the man said, handing a small key to Alex. The man seemed to be one of those people that absolutely hated their job, but it paid well enough for them to suffer through the pain for the cash. Well, that's one thing the two have in common.

"Thank you, sir," Alex mumbled, quickly pulling the key from his hands and holding it tight in his fist. Alex would have to remember to put his key in an obvious spot. Alex knew he would be getting roommates, something he wasn't quite looking forward to, but the rent would be cheaper, so it was Alex's best option at the time.

The moment Alex made it into his dorm room, he was already regretting not spending the extra money on rent for a singular room. Luggage, half unpacked items, and three human bodies were scattered across the room, the clutter messing with Alex's brain. "You must be Alexander!" a tall man with a gray beanie exclaimed, rolling onto his stomach.

"And you must be my roommates," Alex sighed, already wanting to escape from his roommates before any real conversation had even begun.

"Nice to meet you mon amie, my name is Marie-Joseph Paul Yves Roch Gilbert du Motier, Marquis de Lafayette, but you can call me Lafayette or Laf," another man said, slightly shorter than the prior male, though still towering over Alex. He also had a thick French accent, something Alex hadn't heard in a long time. Alex nodded his head at the Frenchman, and quickly entered the second room to set his bag on the empty bunk. In two of the corners, two desks were pushed together for a so-called workspace, providing just enough room for the boys.

"Ooh, we should do twenty questions to get to know each other!" Laf grinned, smiling at the short, curly-haired boy and the boy with the beanie who was still unnamed.

"Sure!" Freckled-boy exclaimed.

"Herc?" Laf asked, staring the beanie boy.

"Why not," Herc shrugged, smiling a little.

"Do I have a choice at this point?" Alex sighed, sitting much more orderly than the three sprawled on the ground. Alexander could tell that college would drag on much longer than he thought it would.


	2. Chapter 1

"After college, what do you plan on doing? Well, at least after this year of college?" Herc asked.

"Visit my family in France, and I'll send you a bunch of photos and make you guys jealous," Laf grinned, obviously proud of himself.

"I'd probably go to the aquarium and look at all the turtles," the freckled boy smiled.

"Design some clothes," Herc said, rubbing his chin to emphasize the fact that he was thinking.

"I haven't thought that far ahead. I'll probably keep working and writing though," Alex hummed.

"Uh, okay," the freckled boy stammered, obviously thinking hard.

"Spit it out Freckled Jesus," Alex spat, narrowing his eyebrows. Alex didn't really have the sense to feel embarrassed, though it was a common thing at this point.

"Freckled Jesus?" the boy asked.

"Alex, that's priceless," Laf was giggling like a teenage girl going to prom.

"What else am I supposed to call you?" Alex asked, "Oh great one, thy freckled boy. The almighty God above all gods."

"N-no, John's fine," the freckled boy laughed.

"Thank you," Alex huffed, crossing his arms.

"Okay, state your name, preferred pronouns, sexuality if you're comfortable, and one fun fact about yourself," John said. "I'll start. My name is John Laurens, I prefer male pronouns, I'm as straight as a rainbow, and I love turtles."

"My name is Hercules Mulligan, Herc for short, I prefer male pronouns, I'm panromantic but asexual, and I love designing clothing and accessories," Herc said.

"I'm Lafayette, Laf for short, we're not having another name crisis here. I prefer male pronouns, I'm pansexual, and I am from France.

"My name is Alexander Hamilton, though I prefer to be called Alex. I use male pronouns, I would rather not share my sexuality with people I just met an hour ago, and I am fluent in three languages." Alex shrugged as if this was a casual occurrence.

The boys asked questions for a bit longer, slowly getting Alex to open up to them a little by little. "Alright, I'm off to bed," Laf yawned, rubbing his eyes.

"Me too," Herc sighed, crawling over to the ladder and climbing up to his bunk. John nodded his head in agreement and dragged himself to the door.

"Lex, you coming?" John asked, opening the door to the second room.

"No, I have to go out tonight. I'll be back in a few hours though. Good night guys," Alex said, quickly pulling one of his giant sweaters over his head, and slipping out of the dorm. Even though he happened to be in a new area, he was still getting calls from people wanting to set up a date for a one night stand or just a quickie in an alleyway.


	3. Chapter 2

At four in the morning, Alex finally made his way back to his dorm. His roommates were still asleep and luckily remained asleep when Alex entered the room. He let out a small sigh, before settling at the desk closest to his bed. Setting his small laptop on the desk, Alex quickly got to work typing up a letter to his history teacher, Mr. Washington.

 

"Dear Mr. Washington,  
If it would not be a problem, I would like to receive some of the class material beforehand. I'm not one that likes to lounge around all day with nothing better to do. I would greatly appreciate it, and I promise to do my absolute best in your class. I would like to give you a warning ahead of time that I may need to leave the class without an explanation at times, so don't be alarmed. If you have any questions or concerns, please send an email in response  
Sincerely,  
A. Ham"

 

Alex muttered as he typed, huffing at every little error in his email. Though it was only an email, Alex was treating it like the email would save his life.  
John groaned, before waking up to see the small boy hunched over at his desk, writing. "Alex, what are you doing up? It's only..." John trailed off to check the time on his phone. "It's nearly five in the morning!"

"Sorry, did I wake you?" Alex asked, turning to look at his curly-haired roommate.

"Yeah, but thanks for that. You're going to sleep." John said, climbing out of bed.

"I'm fine, I just woke up," Alex said, turning back towards the shabby laptop.

"If I do recall, you went out for reasons at nearly eleven last night. You can't tell me that whatever you were doing didn't take a while." John huffed, pulling Alex from the desk chair. "He's ridiculously light," John thought.

"I'm fine. Now put me down and let me get back to work." Alex huffed, struggling in John's grip.

"Work? What work, Alex? You know what, nevermind. It doesn't matter. Whatever work it is, it can wait until tomorrow." John grumbled, shoving Alex onto the top bunk. "Now get some sleep. We can go out to breakfast or something tomorrow."

Alex sighed, knowing this wasn't an argument he could win. Even though he hated to admit it, he was awfully tired. Plus, breakfast in the morning sounded nice.


	4. Chapter 3

When Alex finally awoke, the three boys were crowded around the desk he was at last night. "What?" Alex grumbled, rubbing his eyes.

"Did you write this?" Laf asked, glancing at Alex for just a moment. Alex had no idea what he was talking about until he looked at the laptop. Of course, it was wide open like Alex had left it last night.

"Uh, yeah," Alex said, raising an eyebrow. 

"When did you even have time to write this? I dragged you back to your bed." John asked, cocking his head a little.

"After you fell asleep, I may or may not have gotten back up to write some more," Alex admitted.

"Alex!" John yelped, eyes widening in alarm.

"Can we just go to breakfast as you said?" Alex asked, still in the process of waking up.

"I guess so. I did promise and all." John huffed, a few curls of hair falling into his face. Alex got up, quickly grabbing one of his hoodies, undergarments, and a pair of jeans, he dragged himself to the bathroom. Looking forward to breakfast, Alex got ready rather quick, pulling his hair into a low ponytail as he walked out of the bathroom.

"Well you're ready to go," Herc remarked, grinning at the short boy.

"Looking forward to breakfast," Alex mumbled, not quite able to wake up.

"Are you okay ami?" Laf asked, taking in the sluggish nature of Alex. "You seemed so energetic yesterday."

"I'm fine, just in need of a bit of coffee," Alex hummed.

 

~~~~~

 

By a bit of coffee, Alex meant four cups. "Quatre tasses, vraiment?" Laf deadpanned.

"Oui Laf, j'en ai besoin," Alex huffed, taking another sip of coffee.

"But coffee and nothing else?" Laf asked.

"Shut up," Alex frowned, hiding it with his cup. John nudged Alex's shoulder, causing him to put the cup back on the table. "Si?"

"Eat something, please," John said, nudging his plate over to Alex. Alex rolled his eyes, but took a bite anyways. 

"Happy? Also, what are these?" Alex asked.

"You've never had waffles before?" John said, his jaw dropping.

"Uh, no. Is that a problem?" Alex asked, raising one brow.

"I'm going to cry," John whimpered, his eyes already watering up.

"John, no!" Alex whined, hugging John from the side. Meanwhile, Herc and Laf were watching with a grin. 

"Our ship has sailed," Laf whispered to Herc.


	5. Chapter 4

The four were already back at their dorms, Alex already back to typing on his laptop. Refreshing his email every few minutes to look for any important emails from his professors or any new emails from nearby employers.

 

"Dear Alexander,  
I'm always happy to find students as eager as you to learn. I can gladly give you a few assignments that will be assigned the week we begin classes. I would be grateful if you wouldn't mention this to any other students since it would be rather unfair to them. Please come down to my class to get the papers. I'll be in my class from 10 AM - 7 PM on Monday through Friday, so feel free to stop by whenever.  
If you wouldn't mind, I'd like to know why you might have to leave the class unexplained so I can have a better handle on the situation and how I can help you in the class.  
Sincerely,  
Prof. Washington"

 

Alex smiled a little, shutting down his laptop and grabbing his shoes. "Where are you going?" Laf asked.

"Professor Washington's class," Alex hummed, "I have to grab a few things."

"Alright. Don't be gone too long. I think Herc wants to explore the campus a bit more today." Laf hummed, not looking up from his magazine.

 

~~~~~

"You must be Alex," Professor Washington said, looking up from his paperwork. 

"Yes, you must be Professor Washington," Alex said, walking up to the desk. 

"Yes, indeed I am," Professor Washington said. "I'm interested in why you decided to email me about the class work."

"I'm a man that cannot stay be idle. I'm also one to work very hard, and I feel that it would be best for me to be able to put in my best effort instead of rushing while being under stress." Alex said.

"No need to be so formal," Professor Washington said with a smile. "I completely understand where you're coming from. I'd also like to know why you might need to leave my class suddenly."


	6. Chapter 5

Classes had finally started up, much to everyone's complaints. Well, everyone but Alexander Hamilton. Sitting in class, he stared at his notebook that was already full of notes. "Bonjour la classe, mon nom est le professeur Lacroix," the professor said. Alex was already fluent in English, Spanish, and French, but he needed to take another year of a foreign language since it was required. Three languages were enough for Alex, so he just stuck with French. "I will be taking attendance now."

Alex cringed when he called out the name "Alexandra Hamilton". Alex had gotten his name changed only a few months ago, but his legal name was filed as Alexander Hamilton. "It's Alexander," he corrected, but Professor Lacroix paid no attention to it.

"Thomas Jefferson?" Professor Lacroix called out. 

"Présent," Thomas called.

"Ah, good to see a student that already seems to be invested in French," Professor Lacroix smiled.

"Oui" Thomas grinned, an evil glint in his eyes when he looked at Alex. This was going to be a long year alright.

 

~~~~~

"So, how was your day?" Professor Washington asked. Alex just grunted and crumpled into a chair in front of Professor Washington's desk. "I take it that it wasn't good."

"It was going well until French," Alex sighed, "He called me by my dead name. It's legally changed now!"

Over the week off, Alex and Professor Washington became pretty close, Alex even stopping by when they both had breaks between classes. Alex typically overworked himself with his homework, while Professor Washington corrected homework sheets. "Did you say anything about it?"

"I did, but he just continued attendance," Alex huffed.

"I'll have to have a word with him," Professor Washington sighed, marking off a few answers on the paper he was correcting.

"Really, it's fine. I can tell him off next time I see him." Alex said, slightly hesitant to have someone step up for him.

"No need, I'd rather have a small argument from teacher to teacher. I know you can get very into your arguments, and I'd rather you not get in trouble for it." Professor Washington hummed. Alex sighed, giving in. He knew Professor Washington was right, though he'd never admit it.

"Seriously, sir, I am completely okay with arguing to get my way. You've seen me do it before, and I'll do it again." Alex said, with a newfound passion. Professor Washington smiled with an unexplainable emotion. It felt like a mix of fondness and a bit of proud parental feelings.

"I am well aware, but I still don't think it's a good idea," Professor Washington stated.

"If you allow me to do this, it'll prove to him that he shouldn't underestimate me," Alex argued, furrowing his brows. Professor Washington sighed, giving in to the persistent boy. Alex smiled, finishing up his math sheet. "I'll see you around," Alex said, before scampering off to his next class.


	7. Chapter 6

When John arrived back in his dorm room, Alex was sitting at his desk. "Hey, Alex, how's it going?" John asked. 

"Good, I just need to finish up this paper and I'll be free for the afternoon in case you want to do something," Alex said, his eyes never leaving the paper.

"What are you even writing anyway? Nothing was assigned in ELA," John pondered aloud.

"I'm rewriting a paper that I'm grading in French. This guy seriously doesn't know how to properly write a paper." Alex huffed.

"Is that required?" John asked, setting a hand on his hip.

"No, why would it be?" Alex asked, his fingers dancing across the keys.

"Then why are you even doing this?" John asked, a small sigh following Alex's response.

"I absolutely hate this kid, and I want every single reason to argue with him."

"Alex, that isn't an excuse," John huffed, pulling the chair that Alex was sitting in away from the desk. "You are going to come to Starbucks with me, and we are going to relax for the day."

"But-"

"I don't want to hear any complaints. You don't let yourself relax enough." John said, slipping on his pair of sneakers. Alex sighed, saving the document and grabbing his shoes as well. John smiled, nearly squealing with glee. He finally got to hang out with Alex, something John had been wanting to do more often since the beginning of school.

 

~~~~~

 

"Hi, can I get one small vanilla latte, and Alex-?" John said, looking at Alex to finish the order.

"I'll have a venti caffe latte with light foam, honey, and three shots of espresso," Alex hummed. The barista nodded, repeating their orders back to them for confirmation. The two waited only a few minutes before leaving with their drinks in hand. John led the two to a park a few blocks down.

"Thanks," Alex said, sipping on his drink.

"Anytime," John grinned. Alex scoffed, glaring daggers at a ridiculously tall man in a magenta jacket. The boy's friend pointed, and they began walking over to Alex and John.

"Hello Alexandra Hamilton, nice to meet you out of class," the boy smirked.

"Pleasure is mine, Thomas Jeffershit," Alex spat, eyes narrowing at the boy before him. Thomas stiffened, a forced smile going onto his face.

"I think your mom should have taught you it's rude to insult people," Thomas noted, glaring at Alex.

"I think she would be encouraging me to keep going, bitch," Alex said, getting to his feet.

"Why don't you pick arguments with someone your own size?" Thomas asked, hiding a smirk at Alex's short stature. Alex climbed up onto the bench, his eyes now level with Thomas'.

"Gladly," Alex spat.

"Okay, Alex, that's enough," John said, grabbing ahold of his hand.

"Listen to your fag boyfrie-" Thomas began, before Alex cut him off with a punch to the face.

"Go ahead and call me what I am, but leave John out of this argument," Alex spat.

"You're nothing but a whore's daughter, Alexandra," Thomas spat, before turning on his heel and walking away. 

"Are you okay, Alex?" John asked.

"Just leave it," Alex huffed, grabbing his drink and heading back to the dorm.


	8. Chapter 7

Right away, John could tell it wasn't alright. Alex was struggling to maintain eye contact with John, something he could always do so well. "Lex, please, just tell me what's wrong."

"Nothing is wrong, John. Thomas just pressed all the buttons he shouldn't have," Alex sighed.

"If you're getting so worked up about it, then something is obviously wrong," John sighed, "Please, let me help you."

"Can you get out the dorm key? I left mine on the desk," Alex said, avoiding the question.

"Not until you tell me what's wrong," John said, hating how he had to push Alex like this.

"I already told you, nothing's-"

"Stop lying to me! In the short time that I've known you, I can easily tell when something's eating at you. You can either tell me now or suffer alone."  
"Then I guess I'll suffer."

"I can tell that's not what you really want," John said, trying to force Alex to open up.

"I think that much is obvious. But it's better for me to suffer alone than to drag others to the pits of hell with me," Alex growled, his eyes filled with a new fire. John opened his mouth, before closing it. He gave in and unlocked the door.

"Welcome back mon amis," Laf grinned, not looking up from where he was painting his nails. "Where were you?"

"Getting coffee," Alex huffed, quickly walking into the room he shared with John.

"Oh no, what happened while you were out?" Laf sighed, looking at John's puppy dog eyes.

"I-I don't know. I think it has to do with what Thomas said to him while we were at the park. I just don't want to make assumptions and make the situation worse," John whined.

"Don't worry mon ami, I know what to do."

"Oh boy."


	9. Chapter 8

"So, what's the point of this get together that came out of nowhere?" Angelica asked.

"Well, our new roommate needs to open up about something. I don't know anybody who is better at getting somebody to open up than you girls," Laf grinned.

"And where is this mystery boy?" Maria asked, laying her head on Eliza's shoulder.

"John should be bringing him soon. He wasn't the most willing to come here," Laf shuddered, trailing off for a moment. "It was a nightmare just getting him to leave his writing."

"So he's a workaholic?" Peggy asked, raising one eyebrow.

"I'd like to say no, but then I'd be a liar," Herc huffed, "He does his absolute best in his classes, only to come home and devote all his time to working. I don't even think he sleeps anymore!"

"Sure doesn't look like it," Laf muttered, getting a small sigh from Angelica.

"John put me down!" Somebody yelled, gaining the attention of nearly everybody in the cafe.

"I can already tell that he will be a tough nut to crack," Angelica sighed. Peggy snickered, before getting smacked on the head by her eldest sister. "Not like that."

"Alex?" Maria asked.

'Huh?" Alex hummed, jerking his head to look at the brunette. "Oh, uh, hey."

"You know him?" Eliza asked.

"Yeah, we uh, met while he was working," Maria explained, sharing a look with Alex.

"This is an intervention, Alex," Peggy joked.

"I literally just met you," Alex deadpanned, "You are not a part of this intervention."

"Rude," Peggy huffed, crossing her arms.

"Look, Lex," John began before Alex cut him off.

"Don't 'Lex' me."

"Alex, look me in the eyes," Angelica growled. Alex met her gaze, furrowing his brows.

"I have just met you, but this needs to stop. I'm not going to sugar-coat it, you look like an absolute trainwreck. From what I've heard, you barely sleep, if you even sleep at all, and you devote your entire life to working your ass off. One day, it will come back and bite you," Angelica spat, her entire body tense.

"Then I'll wait for the future to come and tear me to shreds," Alex stated, his entire face devoid of emotion. "I'm too deep to be pulled out now. I'm stuck in a pit of quicksand, and it's already up to my throat. There's no saving me, so all you can you is step back and watch as it consumes me and slowly suffocates me."

"Oh don't be an idiot," Angelica huffed, "You can be saved, it's just a matter of if you want the help or not."

"And I'm afraid that I'm too far in debt to the world to ask for more," Alex said.

"I um, hate to interrupt your speech, but can I talk to Alex in private?" Maria asked. She never got a spoken answer, though Alex getting up was enough.

"Alexander Hamilton," Maria growled once they were out of range to their friends. "I know you better than all of them, assuming you haven't spilled your guts to your roommates. I know what you do for a living. I know how much you want to be better. I know that you work so hard in hopes of being able to use your passion to save you from yourself."

"Please," Alex scoffed, "I'm chasing nothing more than a pipe dream."

"Alex, they care about you. They just want the best for you, and so do I. You and I once were just working together for your job, but we soon became more than that. You spilled your soul to me, told me your every secret, each issue. You told me everything there is to know about you. Granted, that may not still be the case, but my point still stands," Maria said, nearly begging. "Please, just take better care of yourself. If not for yourself, then do it for us."

Alex sighed, before nodding. "Yeah, alright. I can try for you guys."

"No, not just try. You have to do it for us."


	10. Chapter 9

"So, what was that chat with Maria about?" Laf asked.

"A shitty motivational speech," Alex sighed, sipping his cup of coffee.

"It was a great motivational speech and you know it. It worked, didn't it?" Maria huffed, crossing her arms and pouting.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever helps you sleep at night," Alex mumbled.

"Well, now that we've both cooled off a bit, I'd like to formally introduce myself," Angelica said. "My name is Angelica Schuyler, and these are my two sisters, Elizabeth and Peggy."

"Please, call me Eliza," Eliza grinned.

"Sure, I've heard your names around campus," Alex shrugged.

"How? You never go anywhere but the cafe, classes, and our dorm?" John asked.

"The cafe can be a great source of intel," Alex smirked. "Like did you know that Thomas Jefferson has a crippling addiction to-"

"I'm going to stop you there. Just, no," Laf huffed. "We hear enough about him from you."

"Is he some sort of romantic interest or something?" Peggy asked. At that, Alex gagged and lurched forward a little.

"That son of a bitch could never be a romantic interest of any normal person. If anyone could ever find room in their heart to love him, I'd call them mad," Alex spat.

"He targets Alex a lot," Laf sighed.

"I know what I am, no need to point it out to the world," Alex huffed.

"Speaking of which, we still haven't talked about what he said at the park the other day," John mentioned.

"Not not, John," Alex muttered, nearly cutting John off.

"Oh boy, now I'm interested," Laf grinned, leaning towards Alex.

"But you were just complaining about how I talk about him too much," Alex mumbled, rather confused.

"I need some good gossip, and I'll take just about everything to get to know my mysterious roommate," Laf shrugged. "Now spill."

"I-it's rather personal, and I'd rather not talk about it," Alex stammered  
.  
"Hold up, did you just stammer?" Herc asked, bewildered.

"Yes?" Alex questioned.

"Oh my god, holy shit. You're always so sure of what you're going to say. This is the best day of my life," Herc laughed.

"Hey! Don't blame me for being embarrassed," Alex stammered, a pale blush covering his cheeks.

"Aw, we didn't mean to embarrass you, Alex," Laf giggled.

"Yeah right," Alex huffed, crossing his arms. "If you're just going to poke fun at me, then I'll gladly take my leave."

"Alex, no!" John called, trying to hide his chuckle. "Please, we brought you out here for a good time. You never come out with us."

"I've got my reasons for being a hermit," Alex huffed, settling down again.

"Yeah, I'm sure you enjoy being a hermit, but we miss you," John frowned.

"You see me every morning," Alex said, thoroughly confused. "Angelica, Peggy, Maria, Eliza, somebody back me up here."

"Nah, we're just here for the show now," Angelica grinned.

"Why do you seem to enjoy my suffering?" Alex asked, furrowing his brows at Angelica.

"I don't know, you're an interesting person. It's funny to see you get so aggravated," Angelica shrugged.

"You'd get a good laugh out of my French class then," Alex joked. "I'm stuck with Thomas and a bunch of close-minded assholes."

"I can imagine things happening," Eliza snorted.

"I'm sure you've heard stories too," Laf groaned, probably remembering something he heard.

"I'm not huge on gossip, actually," Peggy sighed, "Though now I wish I had paid more attention. I'm sure Alex would have been the topic a lot."

"That entirely depends if you're ready to hear some rude and absurd things," Alex shrugged, "I'm the topic of a lot of stupidity."


	11. Chapter 10

"John, we need to talk," Alex said, pulling John into their shared dorm room.

"Should I feel like a concerned boyfriend when he hears that from his significant other?" John asked, a joking tone to his voice.

"I--er, it's about what happened at the park," Alex mumbled, scuffing his feet on the floor. John immediately grew worried and put his hand on Alex's shoulder.

"Lex, trust me, no matter what, you'll still be one of my best friends. Noting is going to change that."

"That's a lie and you know it," Alex huffed, frowning at John. "I suppose I should begin and stop stalling. So hi, I'm Alexander Hamilton, the odd trans kid from the Carribean. My French teacher called me by my deadname, and I feel that the teasing won't be stopping at Thomas. And the comment about my mother being a whore, Thomas was just spitting lies. She just remarried another man, who was my father. The father of her first son called her a whore for leaving him, and rumor spread rather fast. It just irks me how Thomas could have gotten his hands on the information about my family. That could be considered illegal, right?"

"I...that's a lot to process. Firstly, I think I should ask if you're okay," John said, slightly wide-eyed.

"Me? I'm fine! I've been living with the facts for years! Thomas is my main concern right now!" Alex waved his arms around while speaking, obviously rather shocked that John was worried about him. "I just dumped a bunch of heavy shit on you, so I think it's only fair to ask if you're okay too."

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine. If you ever need anything, don't hesitate to tell me," John said.

"I...can I have a hug?" Alex sheepishly asked. John wrapped his arms around the shorter boy, resting his head on Alex's head.

"Just know that you deserve all the hugs in the world," John mumbled, pressing his lips to Alex's head. Alex leaned into John, grinning ear-to-ear because of the warm body next to him.

"Whoever ends up marrying you will be a lucky man," Alex comments. And with that, John turns bright red.

"A-Alex! You can't just say things like that! Do you know how embarrassing that is?" John stammered.

"Hmm? No, sorry if I made you uncomfortable," Alex muttered, nuzzling closer to John, which was nearly an impossible feat at this point.

"No, I...would it be bad if I said that I liked this?" John asked.

"No, now get on the damn bed. I wanna cuddle," Alex muttered, giving John a light shove towards the bed.

"If it can get you to relax and possibly sleep, I'm down," John shrugged, letting Alex lean on him as he strode to the bed. John laid down, Alex soon resting his head on his lap and hugging his thighs. John hesitated, before running his fingers through Alex's long locks. Alex smiled and leaned into the touch, prompting John to keep going. "I can't imagine what'll happen when Laf and Herc see this," John laughed, though he was merely talking to himself because Alex was lost to his dreams.


	12. Chapter 11

Alex slowly came to, almost forgetting where he was. Keyword almost. Alex stared at John's thighs for a moment too long, before looking up at John. Said boy just smiled down at Alex. "Have a nice nap?"

Alex's face flushed bright red before he was able to utter a reply. "Y-yeah, thanks."

"You should get more sleep like that more often. You seem to be a lot more energetic this morning," John commented, still running his hand through Alex's hair.

"How long have I been out?" Alex asked, sitting up next to John.

"It's seven right now," John said. Alex panicked for a moment, before realizing it was Saturday and he was free of classes.

"I'll admit, getting more than three hours of sleep does feel rather nice," Alex grinned. "Wanna go make a coffee run?"

"I--sure?" John questioned. John reached over for the hairbrush sitting on the nightstand next to his bed and sighed. "I really don't feel like trying this morning."

"That's one of the most relatable things I've ever heard come from you," Alex joked.

"You know what I'm talking about," John scolded with a grin, punching Alex's shoulder.

"Doesn't make it any less true," Alex shrugged, sliding off the bed. Alex slipped an oversized hoodie from one of the hangars in the closet and rifled through a drawer in his dresser to find a pair of pants. Alex dragged himself to the bathroom, while John struggled to get out of bed. As well rested as he was, he was comfortable and didn't quite want to get up just yet. 

John sighed before pushing himself to his feet.

John quickly pulled out a t-shirt, flannel, and a pair of jeans, before also sliding away to change. There was a loud clanging from the bathroom and an equally loud curse from Alex. "You okay in there?" John asked, lightly knocking of the door.

"Yeah, just burned my finger with the flat iron," Alex huffed, opening the door and sheepishly looking at John. Alex pulled his now-flat hair into a ponytail and stepped out of the bathroom. He was dressed in a plain black t-shirt and a pair of loose jeans, his hair not quite all the way in his ponytail. 

"Ready to go?" John asked, grabbing his bag.

"Yeah,' Alex said, sniffling slightly, "Let's get going."


	13. Chapter 12

"You sure you're alright?" John asked, glancing over at Alex as he sneezed for the fifth time in the past few minutes.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Alex said, his sentence ending with a coughing fit.

"Sure you are. We're heading back to the dorm," John huffed, rolling his eyes at Alex. He picked him up, gently holding him bridal style. Alex pouted but nevertheless sipped his coffee as John carried him back to the dorm.

"We have a code red!" John yelled, kicking open the door to the group's dorm.

"What happened?" Laf asked, jumping off the couch.

"Alex is sick," John pouted, nuzzling his head up to the smaller boy's head.

"I knew this would happen," Herc huffed, taking Alex from John's arms. "He works himself until he gets himself sick."

"Well, what shall we do?" Laf asked. "We can't just magically make him get better."

"John, can you go make something for Alex?" Herc asked, pressing his hand to Alex's forehead. "And maybe an ice pack or two," Herc added as an afterthought. John nodded, before rushing off to grab what was asked of him.

"I really wish Alex took better care of himself," Laf mumbled, brushing a few strands of long hair from his face.

"I think we can all agree on that one," Herc nodded. Alex opened his eyes and glanced up, his eyes cloudy.

"Hmm? What's going on?" Alex slurred, weakly glancing around the room.

"You worked yourself sick," Herc scolded, narrowing his brows at Alex.

"Is that all?" Alex asked, getting a small nod of confusion from Laf. "Then let me get back to work. I can't afford a missing assignment."

"Alex, you're sick! You are going to rest, even if I have to strap you to your bed," John huffed, walking over with a bowl of soup and an ice pack wrapped in a thin towel.

"Doesn't sound like relaxing to me," Alex mumbled, rolling over.

"Lex, please. Just take a break," John pleaded. "Just for a little while."

"I agree, if you're working yourself sick, you should take some time for yourself," Herc said, standing up from the chair he was previously sitting in. "Laf, can you come to the drug store down the street with me so we can try to find some cold medicine and soup?"

"Of course!" Laf exclaimed, jumping from his seat and running to grab his shoes.

"You think you'll be fine with Alex?" Herc asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I'll be fine, just come back as soon as possible," John nodded, brushing a few strands of hair from Alex's face.

"Whatever you say," muttered Herc, before following Laf's lead and grabbing his shoes. The two left the dorm shortly after grabbing their jackets.

John softly pressed his lips to Alex's forehead, brushing a few of his sweaty locks of hair back. "You truly are something special, you know that Alex?" John asked, pulling back and looking at Alex's hazy eyes.

"Mmhm, I've been told," Alex muttered, laying his head on John's shoulder. "You know I love you, right?"

"I--no, I didn't. I just thought it was more a platonic thing," John said.

"If you want, it only has to be platonic," Alex hummed, nuzzling his head further into John's shoulder.

"No, no, I... I kind of want it to be something more," John flushed.

"Good," Alex muttered," because I feel the same."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After a year of writing, editing, and more writing, I finally finished the entire story.


End file.
